written by owen on 2021-Oct-31.
I've probably done this before and most likely will do it again. Because, guess what? - you have to do something with your time. You have to move forward in some way, even if you are stuck moving in the past. Misbehaving for days. When you catch yourself in a familiar position you wonder if this is the time you will shift into a better gear. But then I think to myself: what is life without struggle?
I spent a bunch of money on my car this month and will likely spend some more next month. There is on driving a car without maintenance. Everything wants to return to chaos - back to what it knows. Back to that place where it finds comfort. Die a hundred times. There is this little piece of plastic that sits on top of the brake pedal that tells the car that you are depressing the pedal. It is a glorious piece of modern engineering. You would never know it's there until the moment it is not.
Words matter. You have to be wary of people who change words and phrases to match the current moment in time only to forget what was said in the past. Maybe they are crazy? Possibly. People are unique and they fear different things. This fear is both a strength and a weakness. If they can't understand it, how can they escape their self made hell? It is a boring life.