Blog Jamaica ( page 5 )

About Jamaica and stuff. 2 pound a weed in a napsack. new article

Its Official! Patties are expensive

written by owen, 2012-Jul-25

Word to you mothers. And that 135 is without cheese. People still eat patties without cheese? really? well I might have to try it.

comment 8

Gods Child commented: some people cannot digest cheese, so they are out of luck, but also a little wealtier ... read 7 more

Blackberry Dumbphone, Smartphones make you smart

written by owen, 2012-Jul-11

Yesterday I took a chance (since crime is down this month compared to the same month last year), parked my Audi and walked down to Cross Roads. To my surprise everybody I saw was carrying a iphone 4 or a Galaxy. I was shocked to realize that Jamaica has finally discovered that the blackberrys where sub-standard, holding them back progressively and have started importing $50,000 dollar phones in order to improve their status and life style.

One guy I spoke to just landed from America and said that America is sweet and the data rates are sweet and everything is sweet and we should totally try to be sweet too but the local companies and RIM were holding us back! "My god 3500 dollars a month for data? waaaa?", he explained with sadness in his eyes "minimum wage is like 4000 a week, that is ridiculous!", he exclaimed as he pulled out his contract for his new iphone 4s, "look at all those terms and conditions? If I was in America I could get 2 of these phones just by being able to spell my name! Out here I have to have a electricity bill, a bank statement and disposable arm or leg. Madness!".

He was starting to scare me so I quickly moved on to the next person. This woman seemed pretty gullible and obviously had received her Galaxy S4 from a male friend because she would not been able to afford it on her own considering the local ICT sweat-shop call-center situation. She was downloading tons of apps on her smart phone both free and paid using Joe Grind's Visa Debit card. At one point she opened Google search and typed in the word "jamaica", I asked her why she did that and she replied; "I don't know, my man said it has something to do with Google Trends and Alexa and tags and stuff", afterwards she promptly sent a email.

I moved on, still amazed at the turn in events I had foreseen 2 years ago, the last time I ventured outside of a air conditioned space. It feels like yesterday, everybody was using BlackBerry, Motorolas and Nokias. I was so disgusted by all the different kinda of phones on the market, the removeable batteries, the replacement keyboards and screens. So I never left the Hilton again. Flash forward today; Jamaicans are ditching Blackberries left, right and center for Smartphones, my stock in Apple and Google should go up any minute and I will finally have some hot girls to chat with in WhatsApp ( not that my current girlfriends are not hot but you know how it goes real ghetto girl give the wickedest slam ).

The next guy was on a call, so I waited while listening to him talk to what sounded like a relative in America, "Yeah mam, send the money and the barrel, I just need a couple hundred dollars to clear my cellphone bill and the shipping costs". He was twanging in his best foreign accent. After the call he opened his weather app - it is raining in Las Vegas, 59 degrees with a slight chance of lightning. He then opened his web browser to track the delivery of a package he was waiting on. By the time he started streaming a movie he had overrun his 1g data plan and it was not even midday. "There is still quite a ways to go but progress has been made", he said while trying to find a open WIFI hotspot, "I used to have cable and internet at home but I no longer need those additional bills, I can do everything from my big screen smartphone", he stated while watching Spiderman 4 (or 5 whatever), "when I get home I just hook this baby up to my 40" OLED TV and no body can tell the difference, not even the employees at Palace Amusement". I found it hard to believe but I drank the koolaide and moved on.

I didn't need to go any further, I got the confirmation I needed that Blackberry dumbphone was finally out and the new big touchscreen phone was in style and everybody in Jamaica will be as smart as I have been for the past 2 years. All the "blackberry is dieing, buy a new phone to feel good" news has FINALLY come true. Soon everybody will be on my level and be able to tweet and like stuff on facebook at a rate never before possible! Soon children from pre-school to high school will start using tablets and begin to get better grades due to saving money instead of buying real physical books.

Now all that is left is for the rest of the country to appreciate my true love. woot!

comment 11

Ayo commented: lol Love the coverage! Well I've never been a blackberry fan ... despite the pitiful looks I get from people asking for my 'pin' when they find out I don't have one..... Never been one with technology and still trying to figure out why Digicel feels like I should be kissing the ground it's built on because 'I'm one of the lucky ones to be selected to receive a 4 day 4g package' Sounds great you shall have some company huh! ... read 10 more

Environmental Disasters And Knee-Jerk Reactions

written by owen, 2012-Jul-2

Have you noticed the haze that have been covering Kingston for the pass 2 months? Anybody know what that is? Its not rain, I am certain. Could be dust from Africa? Somebody needs to tell me!

So last week a hazardous substance was released somewhere near the Kingston habour causeing the closure of the portmore toll road. Not only is it bad that the force toll road had to be closed diverting hundreds probably thousands of cars to the alternate route on Mandela Highway - It was reported that 10 people from the toll plaza had reported sick and had to seek medical attention before the it was realised that something was wrong. Half the people in Portmore could have died and not one would have realised until it was time to go home. Its a good thing we can see hurricane from a long way off.

Up until the time of this writing they still have not found out what was released and infact they might never find out. I imagine SOMEONE SOMEWHERE is diligently righting the full report. Which brings me to question the government's ability to handle environmental desasters at such a scale in heavily populated areas. Thousands of containers arrive at the Kingston Harbour on a dialy basis - what kind of contingence measures do they have to ensure that those containers aren't carrying some kind of lethal chemical that could potentially be leaking into the enviroment? Must we wait until people get sick or die before someone pays attention?

It has been only 2 years ago when a Chlorine spill forced the closure of the Kingston Wharves. Even from my own recent experience (2 months ago ) I have witnessed brown slugge leaking (or being released) out of a ship heading towards the Kingston Habour - considering that I was watching in a commercial airline you would have to be spilling ALOT of oil for me to be seeing the trial from 20,000 feet in the air. Maybe its regular ship behaviour, I do not know, but I am sure it cannot be good.

In 2009 Sulphuric acid spill affecting more than three kilometres of the Kingston Harbour shoreline, has left fish dead and prompted a warning from the Office of Disaster Preparedness and Emergency Management (ODPEM) for humans to stay away. In 2010 there was a oil spill between the Petrojam Oil Refinery and Hunts Bay Power Station, operated by the Jamaica Public Service.

Over the years there have been several fires at the Riverton City Solid Waste Dump. Only god knows how many people that affected and how long it took to detect and contain the fire. One thing is sure MILLIONS OF DOLLARS were spent because we love spending money on preventable events are regular intervals.

The problem is not limited to Kingston either because serveral fish kills have been reported to in various rivers across the island. These events are often linked to various nearby factories.

The majority of events often results in a "response" to the event. This response often occurs as a knee jerk reaction too late to identify to the cause of problem as in the case of the portmore toll closure. I am not casting blame on National Environment & Planning Agency because they have their hands full with habitual polluters and Owl molesters. I am hoping to bring light to how important it is for all of us to monitor our environment and ensure that it stays healthy. And we should also seek to employ more forms of preventative and early detection systems to curtain the effect that these disasters have on people and the environment alike.

In the long run I hope the government seeks to establish better prevention and monitoring mechanisms instead of waiting for things to go bad. This will help you to avoid having a press conference to announce the writing of a full report which either never comes out or amounts to a high school level essay.


Riverton City Dump Fire 3

written by owen, 2012-Feb-20

One day it seemed like acid rain began to fall, my eyes are still burning :(


Riverton City Dump Fire 2

written by owen, 2012-Feb-20

winds change, nukes toll road


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